1. |
Hope
03:33
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With the change of the seasons, I'm finding a change in me
All this frustration has built inside me, I'm not the person I wish to be
My friends they give me advice, but its never enough. Its never enough.
I'm wasting time sitting inside this home
I've lost my grounds, my feet stuck on the side of the road
What happened to my life? I was ready
But now I've gone on hold, where do I pick up and start again?
These streets I've walked one thousand times won't be the death of me
But they sure as hell will come close
And I should know by now to stop wasting my time
Cut my pride and take the love I get
I've got this hole in my heart because I fail to take advantage of all thats lied before me.
Only when I've been stifled do my eyes open, and do I see what I once had.
Hello?
When will I pick myself up. I've got to pick myself up.
I take the long drive home, staring into darkness
I feel I'm at the top of the world, but the top of the world bares the most weight.
I write these songs to remind myself that I've been there before, I'll be there again.
My failures have made me who I am
And victories my confidence
I've got to let go of this fear
To start again, and to start fresh.
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2. |
Beautiful Mess
01:50
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My story's been rewritten a few times
Characters have gone and went
Plot spins, and settings reset
I've lavished my life through the words of this pen
I guess I should take my own advice, get out and leave this wreck
My life is just beginning
But I'm not feeling much hope
With all the reports around, how else should I leave this home?
I'm twenty years old headed out toward the world
A beautiful mess, and I got this head full of hope.
Take my hand, I know I can't do this alone.
Emma please, you won't go at this alone.
You've got demons and monsters you refuse to face
A life on hold to convince yourself you're okay
But open your eyes. Wake up and look up.
I love you regardless, but no i won't wait.
I'm twenty years old headed out toward the world
A beautiful mess; I got this head full of hope.
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3. |
Start Again
03:14
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Three years down, and I'm still stuck in this home.
I've made some progress but not enough to make myself proud
Days go by slower than you think when you're all alone trying to start again
"Just give it time. Write it down." Words from a friend I'll remember twenty years from now.
I'm moving on to start again
Away from the nothingness into a beautiful mess
New York will always be my home but how can I say I'm happy here,
when I've never been there?
No, I won't miss everyone, in fact I'm glad to leave a few behind.
If I fought for you, I want you in my life.
This is my thank you; my gratitude.
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4. |
Lost
03:00
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This song is for you
Every breath exhausted on you
I've kept my tongue tied
It's crept down, my stomach's in knots
you've wasted so much time
in your cave; in your own world
and yet you question why i chose a life far from you.
You're the perfect example of whom i'm not to be
a truth i thought to be a bluff
you cost me a love
now i'm taking the reigns to find it again
and leave you behind, no this is not a threat
i'm sick of the mystery always getting the backseat to that whore you call your friend
I'm only twenty years old
and the worlds proven to be cold
tell me when do i get that father, son advice?
I've been seeking and trying to start my life off right
but this compass can't help me, i'm traveling in circles
this is my chance to start again to find
what i thought to be gone and dead
i've got all this time to learn and forgive
to be the man you never could me
All this frustration has built inside me
You're not the person i wish to grow up to be
i'm getting ready to prove to you
my passion for this will push me through
and if i don't see you again
i wish you the best never forget your past.
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5. |
Big Willy
03:08
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Well i wear my heart on my sleeve.
Talk big to conceal my grief
I've got bigger eyes and even larger hopes
And I don't think i'm strong enough to take that blow
It takes me so long to climb
But I fall three times as hard
Don't leave me
You're more than you think to me
Protect this wall, i'm coming down
Trust me
I'm a fool from the start, you see.
I'll dig in deep and still feel free.
It's the small victories that make my drive
And smaller failures that keep me awake at night
I feel i'm trying so hard and getting no where
Like escaping from the world by climbing trees to get to heaven
Or chasing your dreams down the road toward the horizon
Desperate and tired, I lose focus of the picture
But I'll tell you now what i tell myself
Hope's not lost, just people and their visions
So fight for what you want
And love what you've been given
Because this world is dark and cold with nothing to believe in.
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6. |
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I've made mistakes, I know that now
A lesson learned to understand my foul
If you took me back to start again
Would you trust that I'd have made a difference yet?
You caught me sitting here, my heads down in my hands
I'm looking for a chance to take to show you I'm not some kind of fake.
My friends, they give me advice
"it's not worth the fight-move on, it's not worth the fight."
A late summer's fling turned to fall
Missed steps and mistakes, I'm not myself at all
I can say I tried.
Remember summer? Remember our first date?
When my car broke down, and we talked the night away?
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